Finding Comfort in Discomfort.

A fundamental problem with being a human is our constant search for comfort. Those people who thrive in extremes and enjoy the uncomfortable are labeled unusual or boat-rockers. Those people who create uncomfortable situations are systematically alienated from the rest of us, who are searching for ease.

Shouldn't the prospect of being aliens be familiar to us, as "aliens and strangers in the world?" If so, then why do we strain so hard for comfort, and is it okay to strain so hard for comfort?

All that to introduce all this:

Part 1: A step in the right direction.

In my experience with various churches in the last seven or eight years, I have found that there are several churches making no attempt to paint the Christian and Christ-following, Spirit-trusting lifestyle as one that is easy. Getting baptized isn't going to automatically solve your problems, get you a job and a tie and land you on the choir.

In many books I've read, there have been various reports of churches that try to paint the picture that life with Jesus is all rainbows and roses. An implication is made that some established churches proclaim that being saved not only saves us from damnation but also the struggles in life. I have never had this experience. I don't know if that's good or bad. Sometimes, church-wise, it is nice to experience things you would never want to do in your own church.

My experiences have been more along the lines of churches avoiding talking about every day life post-salvation. Sermons to Christians tend to be more along the lines of, "This is what you should not do, and this is what you should do." There is no, "There are people here who know Jesus, but have problems in their marriage. There are people here who know Jesus, but have stuggled and continue to struggle with addictions. There are people here who know Jesus, and they are depressed, clinically, and are not sure about the practicality of continuing to live. I know there are those people here because my life isn't easy. I have issues that come up. My checkbook seems thinner than I need it to be. Here is how faith, community, love, and sacrifice, our own and our God's will help us through that. And once we're through that, here are the amazing places we can go. Here are the adventures yet to look forward to."

Lately, I have been to three different churches that seem to honest about how life really is; Forefront (Virginia Beach, VA), Common Ground (Fredericksburg, VA), and Momentum (Cleveland, OH). The similarities between these churches isn't surprising, as the founders of each came from the same place and influenced each other.

Intentionally talking about the uncomfortable things in life may be the first step toward becoming comfortable with discomfort. It opens the door for discussion about real life issues. As church-leaders, this makes us more accessible and seen as survivors, warriors. Men (or women) fighting the fight with the eyes on the prize. Someone worth following.

Part 2: The Next Step

Loving people. Both Momentum and Common Ground use a variation of the same theme, which starts out with "Love God, Love People." I think Forefront uses some variation of this as well. All three also freely advertise the lack of perfect people.

If we can create an environment where there is certain amounts of discomfort and openness is expected, then an increase of tolerance for things that make us uncomfortable is possible. If that is possible, then with the proper vision, could not discomfort regarding other things be tolerable, expected, and most of all exciting?

If loving God means acknowleding that being a Christian doesn't automatically mean everything is going to be peaches and cream, then loving people should mean acknowledging that it is not always going to be cream and peaches. I don't know how. It just seems like a logical progression.

Breaking down the American (human) desire for everything to be comfortable should be step one because in real life...in my life...it's not. I think Jesus tried to paint this picture in a lot of parables...such as the parable of the lost sheep...Our own comfort as Christians cannot be the paramount concern. The pharisees and probably even some of Jesus' followers were uncomfortable being around the "sinners and tax collectors."
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At Forefront, Vince spoke about the movie, Munich, and he talked about revenge and the almost instinctual (and sinful) desire for vengeance most people struggle with, with or without Christ. He then

At Mo', a guest speaker whose name I cannot recall spoke in depth about the stuggles with fear he was experiencing following a troubled pregnancy/miscarriage. Certainly not the rainbows and roses of a fearless Christian. He then said that through Christ, and with Him through prayer, forward motion away from the acknowledged fear is possible and exciting.


-Matt

The search for new

I like to think about church- to a point. Eventually my head hurts and I have to stop. I think about questions like, "What does a mature Christian look like?" And, "Discipleship is cool, but to what end?" We talk about discipleship and discipling communities, but to what end. Small Groups are cool, "But to what end?" How do small groups become evangelizing communities that are never allowed to become stagnant and inward focused?
I love these questions and like thinking about them. But, eventually my head hurts and I can be frustrated. I have been learning about a church called Real Life Ministries where they are all about small groups and have hundreds of small groups. I love their ideas. They see small groups as evangelizing communities. They believe that everything happens through relational discipleship. Then I just finished a book called The Church of Irresistible Influence. It was a great book, but it had a totally different view of church structure. They had small groups that people went to for up to three years and then joined small groups called "Common Cause." You committed to these groups for one year and each group was focused on a specific community service project for that year. Cool.
The goal was to get people in the community serving. Well, I was confused and wondered what ideas we could take from both churches and try to see how they fit in with Momentum's specific calling. My head hurt. I called the church from the Irresistible Influence book to ask about their groups because I had a few important questions. Well, I guess my questions landed on the money because they don't structure their church at all like the book anymore. They have resorted back to a more normal small group structure and encourage everyone to serve in the church somehow on top of serving in the community. I thought that was funny, how I was being influenced by an idea in a book that a church had been gun-ho about, but a few years after the book was published, abandoned for whatever reason. It was a good reminder that new ideas can be fickle and that although new idea trains are always leaving the station, it doesn't mean I have to board them all.
I know that we'll never have a perfect church on earth. Honestly, I find that frustrating sometimes. And I do love aspects of many churches. I love Momentum and the things we do. I believe we're as close to all the things I think a church should do as I've seen. I love aspects of other churches to. But, it's frustrating seeing new ideas and hearing differing ideas of all the things the church should and could be. I bet if I wrote down everything the church "should" be, it'd be totally impossible!
Being reminded of your post, a few posts ago. I guess that's why instead of trying to find the newest church ideas, we need to find our personal passion and calling. Then figure out how that specific gifting, passion, and calling work into a specific community. Then all future cool new ideas need to fit into the specific passions and callings I've been given.

Questionsº¿º

This is somewhat off-topic, but it is an offshoot from excitement I had regarding conversations I had with some youths/early 20 somethings in the last 72 hours.

Is there a place for questions and what questions should I be asking? Ironically, those are the questions I frequently find myself confronted with. This weekend, I spent some time at a beautiful Christian camp and got to experience, to an extent, what it would have been like to grow up in a Christian environment. There are some things I wish I would have known, and there are some other things that I did get a chance to know that I would not have if I had gone to such a camp. As far as the color spectrum went, let's just say there weren't many prisms around to break up the white light.

What was awesome and uplifting was the message preached on Sunday morning, titled "Four Questions."

The culture of asking questions, I think, is a healthy change from what I've always perceived as mainline church attitudes. This is addressed in a blog from the links section (Pontifications of the Sinister Minister) who speaks about home-schooling and discusses the perceived attitude in some church circles of not being exposed to things that may bring out questions. If there are no questions, then there are no struggles.

I contend that if there are no struggles, then there is no growth. In the KJV translation, when Acts (which I'm obsessed with right now) talks about Saul's converstion, Saul asks two questions: Who are you, Lord? What do you want me to do? I want to be the part of a movement in the body that urges every single human it comes in contact with to ask these questions, over and over again when necessary.

Where is the line? Is there are a line? I want to be available if people have questions, but I don't want to find myself in a debate that is going to lead to nothing but being emotionally and mentally drained.

Church leaders have to ask questions, too. Their title does not protect them/us from having to communicate with God, though the Acts 29 link on the right of this page shared alarming statistics that most pastors only read the Bible when preparing sermons. Are people growing? Am I helping people serve and love one another? Am I pastoring an inwardly-focused community or am I leading people to reach out? Am I making it so comfortable that people don't want to reach others? Am I making it so uncomfortable that people are distracted from the true purpose of church? Am I talking to Jesus? How is Jesus speaking to me, and what is He saying? (Note in the last question, that it is not "Is Jesus speaking to me?" I may not be able to hear an audible voice, but I think Jesus' movements in my life are there if I look for them.)

A crazy question that needs to be asked because of the financial focus of our culture: Am I trusting in the Holy Spirit in my church's pursuits/finances/seekers while still being responsible with what God has given me in light of our current culture?

Here's one last quote from the Hues in the Pews article:

The Culver Palms UMC, one of 300 "excellent" U.S. churches recently publicized by writer Paul Wilkes, celebrates its ethnic mix but doesn't target percentages. "What we are very serious about is spiritual growth and spiritual challenge" in the Methodist tradition, said pastor Terry Van Hook. "We feel that everyone whom God has brought here has a chance to strengthen their faith and their passion for a ministry that God has given them," he said.

I think this part is important: "What we are very serious about is spiritual growth and spiritual challenge." There is a challenge involved. There is an idea of openness about an ongoing and very personal struggle. There are questions involved that don't have easy solutions. It plays into the idea of having something worth fighting for, a concept that is universal. It is a concept that can spread like wild-fire, if it is shared with acts of love and servitude. It gets my heart beating and begs me to ask, "What do you want me to do, Lord?"

That ended up being about three times as long as I intended it to be.

tension

I tend to think that the best theology is that which is held in tension. That God is grace and justice. That God gives people freewill but somehow predestination works into the equation. How do we deal with the issue of making church “entertaining” and a “safe place” for those who don’t know God where they won’t be “weirded out”, but also allow those who know God to freely express their love for God? That Sunday morning will be a place where people can come to experience a real God who really can show up in ones life?

I love people who go to Charismatic churches for a few reasons, but the main one is this: they worship a real God that really can show up in people’s lives. They also tend to be passionate about prayer and it seems that passion for prayer can be linked to their strong belief that God can speak to them. I love that. It seems the only issue with this is that people who hate going to church can be weirded out by this.
It seems to me that churches like Momentum lean in the other direction, whether intentionally or unintentionally, where logic and purposeful thought reign supreme. Decisions are made by management teams and by “the bottom line,” more than being “led by the Spirit.” It can be more of a “business model,” where decisions are logical and one believes that the Spirit moves by logic and that God primarily gives the minister the gift and freedom to make decisions.
Dan Kimball, in his book Emerging Churches notes how an Asian guy was coming to America to take a tour of American churches to see how they were doing. His comment was that the American pastor was more like a businessman than a holy man. I found that very interesting and challenging. I have been trying to think how to react to that? Maybe he needed to change his definition of holy. Maybe he’s on to something and many newer churches don’t make enough room for the role of “pastor” to maintain meaning as a “holy man.” In the end I feel it is an unfair assessment that is not taking into consideration of our culture. But, I do feel he is touching on something that should challenge us.
I want to be sensitive to those who don’t know or understand Jesus and I do believe that God has given us the faculty of reason to make decisions. But, I also want to be reminded to listen to God, believe that a real God can really show up in a real way in life, and believe that God wants to speak to me and show me where He’s working around me so I can join Him.
I don’t want to be a business, I want the church to always be a spiritual entity. We may look the same on the outside as all Mo-looking churches, but I do want to always remember that we are being led by the Spirit of God. I never want to forget the spiritual aspect of being a pastor that differentiate me from Bob CEO down the street.

Something Worth Being Part Of

I've found there is a simple truth in that when a spotlight is placed on a particular problem, it becomes easier and easier to see the smaller cracks that create the problem. In my experience, I've seen truth in the concept that a church looks like its leader, but my beliefs don't allow me to accept that that is the way it has to be.

I was reading an article called Hues in the Pews about a statistical study by one of the authors of "Divided by Faith." It has some great quotes in it, that I thought I would pass along.

First, "...In other words, few churches are going to grow because they have made integration for integration's sake a primary goal. 'Almost none of the multiracial churches that were successful had [integration] as their goal,' said co-investigator George Yancey of the University of North Texas. 'Something else was the goal that united them,' Yancey said. 'For evangelicals it was reaching the neighborhood and urban areas, and maybe for liberal mainline churches it would be the environment or social justice issues.'

My thoughts: All people want something to believe in. All people want something worth fighting for. All people want the chance to leave a legacy. I have never tied this to the cause of Diversity, but, due to my own circumstances of finding Christ and my own dispositions, this is one thing I am very passionate about: Focus. My church has vision. It has goals that every single person at that church understands and knows they can be a part of accomplishing. This is the first time I've ever experienced that, and the feeling of being part of something, being part of a movement is inspiring. Maybe fostering that feeling and getting behind something all types of people can understand (something like reaching the neighborhood and urban areas) is the first step.

That's all I have time for right now, but more shall come.

Niche Church or something else.

Over the past few decades or so we have experienced the "Burger King" ing of the church. What I mean is this: Your way right away. In some ways the church has lost the battle in America. The population at large doesn't care about church and has not desire to go. In response to this individuals developed this idea: Let's find specific, smaller populations within the larger population and create a church that caters to them. In this way we have witnessed the advent of the biker church, the middle-class white man's church, the bar church, the skeptic's church, the goth's church, etc. Each one caters to a specific niche population.
In planting a church, the church planter needs to ask two questions. First, are we going to be a niche church? Second, what niche is that? John Maxwell explains that, "Who you are is who you attract." This means that since Rick Warren dresses a certain way, thinks a certain way, and believes a certain way, his congregation is going to be and look a lot like him.
I am interested in the question of how does a church planter in the niche market of church planting today create a church that targets two niche populations for the purpose of diversity? For example, I am very interested in those who hate going to church, but are interested in spirituality. This kind of language seems to come from and cater to upper-middle class white Americans. But, I am also curious about the issues facing the African-American church. I am also interested in the 20 something African-American male who hate going to church. Honestly at first glance I wonder if creating a church that hopes to reach both the 20-something African American male and the 20-something white male is possible.
The difficulty is found in American culture. To cater to both cultures will require some level of discomfort in both groups. Americans hate discomfort and so are apt to find a place where they can be more comfortable. There is the biological idea that the human body is always fighting to stay in homeostasis. As soon as its temperature is up a few degrees, it fights to bring it back down. The same is true in church. We want to be comfortable. If we're not, we'll go to the church down the street where we are promised to be made comfortable.
This is my quandary. Maybe this isn't possible and so maybe the best we can do right now is to create a niche church that caters to people like me and the other leaders in the church and befriend a church that caters to a different population. I honestly don't know the answer. But, I do think that the church today is falling into the same traps of diversity that our parents fell into and unfortunately I believe that we're making them worse through creating homogeneous congregations where all are made to feel comfortable by being around people just like themselves.